There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Randomize
