sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
