Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
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