Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
Randomize
