Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
