she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
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