so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
