i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
