i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Randomize
