I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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