For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize
