and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
