Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
