I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Randomize
