Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
