Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
Randomize
