Ambien. No doubt about it.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Randomize