hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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