You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Randomize
