Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Randomize
