Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Randomize
