A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
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