CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
you never un-have a 4some
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
