I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
