My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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