JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Randomize
