it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Randomize
