we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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