soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
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