all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Shitshow foam night was such a success
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
