um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
These tits shall not be calmed
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize