I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
