Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
