dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Randomize
