so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
