is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
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