Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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