Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
