Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
