This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
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