We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
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