I want to walk on stilts...naked
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize