Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
Randomize
