Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
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