Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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