She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
