So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
We are all done wearing pants today
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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