Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Randomize
