bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Randomize
