You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I lost the right to judge tonight
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
