I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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